Two down three to go

The good news: I just submitted another chapter, the methodology, to my supervisor and a complete, hopefully accurate, bibliography with over 200 entries. Two down and only three chapters to go. The brain work seems so easy when it used to be so hard.

The bad news: The chapters are too long,the bibliography too copious. A thesis is shorter these days. I've accumulated too much inforation over too many years. I’m writing 5 to 10 hours a day and have RSI in my right arm. It must be from using the mouse to fix my bibliography entries. My shoulders are too tight and I’ve developed a permanent sharp pain in the back of my neck. I thought I had my ergonomics right. The monitor sits on a telephone book and I removed the arms of my chair. I need to get out more.

My current status: I checked my 8 appendices to the thesis and the old disks from 9 years ago have died, as did my first computer. Now I can’t recover my much-needed files. I found hard copies so I’ll on coding my research data.

My drink: Lost track of time and dehydrated.

My food: Too much snack food. I’ve put on 2 kilos since writing these chapters. More exercise needed.

My Music: Too busy writing in silence. I live in a world of words. My instrumetns are for data collection.

My next task: Get out and walk for 1 hour a day… urgently.

I've done it

The good news: I’ve done it. I submitted the chapter of my Literature Review to my supervisor. I am so pleased with myself.

The bad news: It was 80 pages long in double spacing. 20,000 words!! My supervisor asked for 10,000 max. I know that post grad supervisors hate getting large chunks of work from their students. The trouble is I had 10 years of accumulated literature to review. The sad fate of being a long-term student.

My current status: Successful external hermit. That doesn’t mean I’m a crab out of my shell although I do feel a bit vulnerable waiting for my chapter feedback. External means I’m studying off-campus. I live 1,200 kms away from my university. That’s loyalty for you.

My drink: Naturally brewed Japanese green tea with a pinch of freshly ground green cardamom pods. Mmmm nice.

My food: Open rye bread sandwich with chicken liver pate, stuffed olives and freshly sliced Lebanese cucumbers. It’s nice to have so much time on my hands.

My Music: Butterfly Lovers violin concerto. I’m feeling quite light headed.

My next task: Perfecting my bibliography that goes with the chapter. I didn’t submit that yet. There are over 200 entries in it and I need to list each one accurately. How did I read all that stuff?

Most recent email: From my supervisor. She said ‘good person.’ That’s all. No more and no less. Wait til she reads it! She said she won’t look at it til next week. Can’t blame her.

What I’m reading right now: ‘Seven Up’ by Janet Evanovich - a funny and grandly surreal crime novel. The blurb on the cover says “it takes balls to be a bounty hunter and Stephanie Plum doesn’t care whose…”

Have a look: http://www.evanovich.com/

Somewhere in China

An ex-colleague sent me a photo of a university campus in China.

It made me think that somewhere in China: there must be a person just like me struggling with words and chapters, fluctuating between elation and depression.

The key to sanity as a post-grad: talk to people and be really honest. That's the best way to stay grounded.

Hold that thought writer

Frame of mind: Trying to hold onto a thought about the transition from assimilaton to multiculturalism; and another about replacing the 'native speaker model' of language teaching with the 'bilingual or multilingual speaker as a goal' model and relate it to past experiences of my research participants.

Distractions: Far too many in the last five days: non-stop visitors, took a sick relative to hospital, my offspring had too many unmet needs and wanted their mother back, my beloved missed me and felt his life slipping away too fast wihtout me. No time to write - so I just held onto my thoughts and I fear they will slip away if I don't write them down soon.

Concerns: The university wants to know if I can do the presentation.

Joys: My publisher came today to show me a proof of my book. It was nice to see my name on the cover.

Consequences: I once thought of applying to a Writers'Conference for Writers but the criteria stated that only those who had actually had a complete work published could apply. That's me now.

Secondary consequences: I've missed my thesis chapter deadline again.

When I loved myself enough

Progress: Still writing and loving it. My chapter's not quite ready yet.

My doubts: If I spent as much time as I do on the computer in a paid job, my life would be so much better. Why don't I just go and get my old job back?

My surprise: A university, not the one I'm enrolled in, wants me to present a paper on Migration and Identity. I'm not ready!! Will I ever be ready for anything? Life is safe and comfortable in virtual reality. Why does real-life-reality keep creeping in?

When I loved myself enough: I began to know I was in the right place at the right time, and I began to relax.